Friday, October 7, 2011

Life Interrupted


1. to cause or make a
break in the continuity or uniformity of (a course, process, condition, etc.).
2. to break off or cause to cease, as in the middle of something: He interrupted his work to answer the bell.
3. to stop (a person) in the midst of doing or saying something, especially by an interjected remark: May I interrupt you to comment on your last remark?
4. to cause a break or discontinuance; interfere with action or speech, especially by interjecting a remark: Please don't interrupt.
1375–1425; late Middle English interrupten < Latin interruptus past participle of interrumpere to break apart, equivalent to inter-
inter- + rup-, variant stem of rumpere to burst + -tus past participle suffix; see rupture
1, 3. intermit. Interrupt, discontinue, suspend imply breaking off something temporarily or permanently.

The mind wonders at this immobility that stagnates my flow. Where did it begin? What will it take to unblock my path again? All the unfinished journals, unfinished artworks, unfinished thoughts…. Where did “it” go? I try to stay positive. I know “it” will come back. Or do I?
There have been so many interruptions… just when I get the “flow” started. I am stopped. Crushed right up against the face of a concrete dam… the pressure against me is fierce. I want to be free. I only know that whatever I do, another interruption will come. The creative process calls out to me. “Come. Do. Move. What do you fear?” I can’t find the way back. I just said my forbidden word, “can’t”. My students would remind me of my reprimands against using it.

I am a soul divided against itself in a state of flux- as in “continuous change; instability”. There is another meaning to the word flux. It also means “to make or become fluid”; it is also “an obsolete word for purge”.
So maybe there is yet hope for finding my flow again?

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